So I work at an animal clinic and today I went in and after being there for about 15 minutes I’m called to the back where a dog threw up, shat himself, and peed on the floor AT THE SAME FUCKING TIME.
(To be fair the dog was freakin’ adorable, while I was on all fours cleaning his massive shit off the floor he kept nudging my face with his nose and looking at me with this “I’m incredibly sorry for making a mess, Madam” face. And yes, the dog had a British accent according to my impression, okay? Fuck off.)
After I’m done cleaning that shit up (no pun intended) I set out to do my actual job which is to sit behind a very comfy chair, troll the internet, and make people pay for their pets shots. But no, today I had to give a cat medicine in her vein which means that I have to closely monitor how much I give the cat cause I can easily overdose and thus end the poor bastards life (you can imagine how fucking stressful that can be). So I’m done with that at 22:00. (I’m supposed to get off work at 20:00) and I’m just about to leave when the veterinarian I was working with reminded me to check on the cat at 22:15 to quote MAKE SURE THE CAT’S STILL ALIVE unquote. SERIOUSLY?
IT’S FRIDAY BITCH. LET ME FUCKING LEAVE AND HAVE A SOCIAL LIFE.
P.S.: Of course, I didn’t. In exactly 2 minutes I’m going to check on the cat, and it better fucking be alive.